I have received some complaints about my lack of updates for the blog. The truth is, I feel as though I haven’t had the time to devote enough meticulous care to create an entry worthy of your time, what with working on my book, finishing my pilots, convincing irrelevant relatives in New York that I’m living the dream in LA, and making enough money to be able to continue on my path of (slight) deception.
The truth is that I’m going to Spain at the end of the month, which has ultimately served as my excuse for not pursuing full time employment in 2013. [The 2012 justification, of course, being the inevitable end of the world as predicted by the Mayans.]
In the mean time I have worked on exploring myself (not just a euphemism for masturbation), met a lot of interesting people, started developing an attraction to and legitimate feelings for Macklemore, and accidentally entered a pseudo relationship with a 40 year old Canadian. (Perhaps 2013 will be the true emergence of my emotional incompetence, officially dubbed the “Daddy Years”)
Relax mom. Don’t get too excited. It was a pseudo relationship. Also, to be fair; I didn’t know he was 40 until the next morning after we had already… exchanged numbers.
He was older than the father of the kids I babysit for, which really freaked the shit out of me, so it obviously had to end. That, and the fact that he believed his wife wouldn’t be too thrilled.
Anyway, I have two more points I’d like to make before I make myself a beverage and bring it out to the pool.
1. In regards to the people who actually take interest in the fact that I’m “slacking off on the blog” I can say, if for nothing else, I’m happy that this whole life swap of mine has somewhat led to reconnecting or staying in touch with people who I would have otherwise lost touch with.
I know for certain I’m irrelevant to their lives. I don’t have familial ownership in an NBA team, a hotel franchise, or own a boat. (Come on. You know at least 26% of the people you keep in your life are for their connections) So, keeping in touch with people, and networking is one of the things I most appreciate. (Attribute that to the exploring process)
Whether it’s an old classmate who once assaulted me on the playground in elementary school, or an individual who has progressed the art of bullying into the real world, I’m oddly happy to keep these people in my (cyber) life.
(Even if the only reason they bring it up is to draw attention to the fact that this is yet another thing that I have started but not finished. Dick)
Regardless, this brings me to 2. In an effort to continue to update, I will be less restrictive on what I post. AKA, I’m leaving the Charmin mantra behind, and going to most likely be compromising quality for quantity.
Don’t be alarmed that I’m selling out. This is the true Hollywood norm. And while I don’t (yet) plan to apply this motto to my sex life as the likes of Gerard Butler, Tiger Woods, and David Duchovny have proven in the past, you don’t need to delve too far into the Twilight series to understand that quality not a necessary component for success in Hollywood.